It’s something lots of people suffer with, but few want to talk about – hearing loss and its effect on personal relationships. Both partners can feel frustrated by the misunderstandings that are created by hearing loss.
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner isn’t it a great time to show your love and appreciation for your loved one? A wonderful way to do this is to have a discussion about your hearing loss.
Having “the talk”
Studies have revealed that an individual with neglected hearing loss is 2.4 times more likely to develop dementia, and that includes Alzheimer’s disease. When the region of your brain responsible for hearing becomes less engaged, it can begin a cascade effect that can affect your whole brain. Doctors refer to this as brain atrophy. You remember how the old saying goes, “use it or lose it”.
Depression rates are nearly half in people who have healthy hearing compared to those who have hearing loss. Studies have shown that as a person’s hearing loss worsens, they frequently become anxious and agitated. This can result in the person being self secluded from family and friends. They are also likely to avoid involving themselves in the activities they once enjoyed as they fall deeper into a state of sadness.
This, as a result, can result in relationship strain among mother and son, daughter and father, close friends, spouses, and others in this person’s life. Communication issues need to be managed with patients and compassion.
Mystery solved
Someone who is experiencing hearing loss might not be ready to discuss it. They might feel shame and fear. Denial might have set in. Deciding when to have the conversation could take a bit of detective work.
Here are some outward clues you will have to rely on because you can’t hear what other people are hearing:
- Complaining about ringing, humming, static, or other sounds that you don’t hear
- Avoiding busy places
- Sudden difficulty with work, hobbies, or school
- Failing to hear alarms, doorbells, and other significant sounds
- Agitation or anxiety in social settings that you haven’t previously observed
- Avoiding conversations
- Cranking the volume way up on your TV
- Frequent misunderstandings
Plan to have a heart-to-heart talk with your loved one if you notice any of these symptoms.
What is the best way to talk about hearing loss?
Having this conversation might not be easy. A spouse in denial may brush it off or become defensive. That’s why it’s essential to discuss hearing loss in a sensitive and appropriate way. You might need to alter your language based on your unique relationship, but the steps will be more or less the same.
- Step 1: Tell them how much you love them without condition and how much you appreciate your relationship.
- Step 2: The state of their health is important to you. You’ve seen the research. You know that untreated hearing loss can lead to an increased risk of depression and dementia. That’s not what you want for your loved one.
- Step 3: Your own safety and health are also a concern. An overly loud television could damage your hearing. Also, your relationship can be affected, as studies have shown that excessively loud noise can trigger anxiety. Your loved one may not hear you calling for help if you have a fall or somebody’s broken into the house. People connect with others through emotion. If you can paint an emotional picture of the what-ifs, it will have more impact than merely listing facts.
- Step 4: Schedule an appointment to have your hearing tested together. After you make the decision make an appointment as soon as possible. Don’t wait.
- Step 5: There may be some opposition so be prepared. These could occur at any time in the process. This is a person you know well. What will their doubts be? Money? Time? Doesn’t see an issue? They may feel that homemade remedies will be just fine. (“Natural hearing loss remedies” aren’t effective and can even be harmful.)
Have your responses prepared beforehand. You may even rehearse them in the mirror. These responses need to address your loved one’s Worries but they don’t have to match those listed above word-for-word
Relationship growth
Discussing hearing loss isn’t easy if your partner isn’t willing to talk about it. Openly talking about the impact of hearing loss on your relationship can help to establish a plan to deal with any communication issues and make sure that both partners are heard and understood. By doing this, your relationship will get stronger and your loved one will take measures to live a longer, healthier life. And relationships are, after all, about growing together.
References
https://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/statistics/quick-statistics-hearing#
https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/hearing-loss-common-problem-older-adults
